Tribute to our Grandma
"After a winter of silence, spring brings such hope, summer brings such warmth, and autumn brings a sprinkling of serenity." ~Marnee
In my community, trees are bursting with beautiful fall colours. The ground crunches as I walk on the fallen leaves. The air feels crisp, yet the sun glows. Yesterday, my three year old son and I went on an adventure through the woods and explored the world beside a babbling brook. Each time a breath of wind blew, a yellow bouquet of leaves would float down to us. With our hands grabbing at the air, we were occasionally lucky enough to catch a leaf before it ever touched ground. I couldn't help but marvel at the beauty of nature and the loyal seasons. I couldn't help but compare this breathtaking fade from summer with the heartbreaking fade from life. Why so pensive? The day before, my grandma was laid to rest. This blog is dedicated to Grandma Sutton, our family's beloved matriarch.
A Letter to Grandma,
When is a grandchild ever ready for her grandma to go? When I am lost in a thought about you, I realize how much you represent my past and who I am today. I realize how you will live on in my children.
To me, you are my childhood. You are family gatherings, mud pies, pots of porridge, and berries with cream. You are everything exciting about being a kid…the anticipation, the giggles, the time together. When you left, I ached that my childhood (and all the sunny days, hopes, time, and butterflies that came with it) had just disappeared far from my reach…too far to ever bring back. Even as an adult, I still held out hope that one day there would be time to recapture moments with you and all that you represent to me. Ironically, I feel closer to you than ever.
Almost daily, you flutter through my thoughts like one of the many butterflies you made for your wall!
Each morning as I do my daughter’s hair, I remember how you used to braid my hair. You made such big, loose braids (one on each side of my head). It was so much easier for my hair to flop and fly (unlike the tight braids my mom put on me…it was like an automatic eyebrow lift). I love telling Taylor how you did my hair…such a sweet conversation to have.
Until recently, I cursed the unfinished part of our yard because of the mud. One day, my kids brought all their sand toys to the mud pit and starting making me cookies and pies. What a disaster. Bring on the fire hose! I sat quietly and peacefully with a smile on my face. OHHH the mud pies I made with my cousins behind grandma’s house! Who needed Disneyland….we had grandma’s old stove!
This summer, I loved taking the kids down to the river to eat berries right from the bush. I tell them the story that you told me about how you saw a bear when you were picking berries when your kids were young. Needless to say, that shortens our berry trip. Still, it makes me happy to think of you and to imagine how you were a mom like me. I aspire to have your strength, resourcefulness, and nurturing ability. A warm meal, warm clothes, and a warm hug … these are the best ways to grow a family.
Even in the middle of the night, when I am getting some milk for Aiden, I think of you…thank goodness I do not have to milk a cow to fill up this cup.
For the rest of my life, I will hold you in my heart. I will carry forward your love to my children. I will feel your embrace when I catch a moment of your presence.
My favourite moments with you come when I am caring for my flowers. A butterfly always finds its way to me…
"When you get to the gates and the angels sing, go the the place where the church bells ring, you know I'll come running...running to find you."
Marnee Brick, MSc
Speech-Language Pathologist and Director of Speech Therapy
TinyEYE Therapy Services (Speech Therapy Telepractice)
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